What BEaRMUDAS Are You?

Good looking Bear wearing shorts during winter! (pic from http://www.dailymail.co.uk)

After a couple of serious posts, I finally decided to write something more light hearted and fun and definitely apt for this coming festive season, well only for those living in a warmer climate. For those who are stuck in the bitter cold climate this year-end, I guess this information will still be useful for you guys during the summer months.

 

What shorts are you? (pic from http://www.google.com)

I want to talk about clothes that fit our bottom halves, specifically shorts, Bermudas, Capri, cropped pants, or whatever you want to call them. Shorts are staple in any Asian Bear’s wardrobe. Regardless of the style, colour and fit, this is a must-have for all Asian Bears.

 

Fashion for Big Size Men (pic from http://www.fashionbeans.com)

Short trousers or simply shorts come in different length and cut. There are many style gurus out there that provide fashion tips on shorts however, most of these tips are for the lean and average size men who want to look slimmer but suggestions for bears are almost nonexistence. I’d scoured almost all the fashion sites and it’s almost impossible to find fashion advice for heavier set men, probably due to the fact that we are as mentioned previously not your “conventional” good-looking man.

Toothpick calves! (pic from http://artofstyle.hucklebury.com)

So we have to throw out the fashion forward views on what looks good on a man and find out what types of shorts fit the bear community and make us look good. Are we looking to cover our skinny upper legs or do we want to expose our thunder thighs instead? How to emphasize our small calves to avoid the toothpick look? Do you want to look smaller or thinner or are we celebrating our mammoth build instead?

Super hot stocky (with great calves!) Tim Kang! (pic from http://theberry.com)

In my personal opinion as an Asian Bear, most of us bears are bear chasers too, meaning that we love our build and size. Therefore, we should embrace our body shape and wear clothes that enhance our bear image instead. So in short (no pun intended), the fashion for bear is all about enhancing our shape and size: to achieve a fuller and perkier butt, to enhance or show off our thighs and calves, and to complement or achieve a balance of upper and lower body of a bear look.

 

What kind of shorts suits the Bear! (pic from https://www.facebook.com/benny.lu1)

There are many types of shorts in the fashion world. I am not going into all the technical details about what is the definition of shorts and the different types available as you can always Google them for answers. What I’ll be focusing instead is on the style that will give you the best fit for a Bear. Every bear definitely can be flattering in shorts as long as they know what types of shorts suit best on their silhouettes.

 

Are you a Big Bird? (pic from http://www.current.org)

Depending on the musculature of your lower body, the right cut and style of shorts will either boost your manliness or transform you into a big bird instead (heavy top with chicken legs). If you’d already own a pair of great, muscular legs, then in reality, most shorts will look good on you. However, for those who don’t, well don’t fret because choosing the right length, style and fit will just give you the improvement that you’d needed.

 

Longer inseam causes shorter look (pic from http://www.aliexpress.com)

With all the bulk that we carry on our body, most of us will look shorter or stumpier than our lean cousins even though we are of the same height. Hence, we have to be careful when choosing the length of the inseam. The longer the pair of shorts is, the shorter we will look. Hence, avoid shorts that are below the knee (some fashion purists don’t think that they are shorts if they fall below the knee).

 

Tarty Party! (pic from http://www.sodahead.com)

The most flattering I find are shorts that fall to your knees or 1 to 2 inches above the knees without compromising your modesty. However, if you have great quads, then by all means go for a shorter inseam so that you can proudly display your thunder thighs. Never go shorter than 7 inch inseam as it will give you a tarty look unless that’s what you are going for or if it’s a sports shorts.

Too Fancy! (pic from http://www.aliexpress.com)

No pleats and fancy designs

Men who are plus size have bulkier body shape and they should look for a pair of knee length shorts with no pleats and fancy design or embellishments. Pleats will make us look bigger at our hips while fancy designs are just too over-the-top feminine. The tailored straight cut style is very flattering to a larger frame and they are also somewhat dressier.

 

Too tight causes muffin top (pic from http://beargoggleson.com)

Avoid muffin-topping!

If you don’t have a firmed and strong gut, make sure you don’t get a waist size too small so that the shorts fits perfectly to your waist lying just above the hip and most important of all to avoid a muffin-top on your mid-section. In addition, don’t go for low waist shorts and especially with lower inseam cause that will make you look even shorter than you really are.

 

Cropped Harem Pants emphasize the small calves! (pic from http://www.aliexpress.com)

Don’t wear cropped pants or Capris

Any shorts that are on or above the knees, the narrowest part of your lower legs are your safest best and try to avoid cropped pants or Capris especially if you have smaller calves. The latter draw the eye to the centre part of your calves and ankles, emphasizing your imperfection.

 

Too Big! (pic from http://www.aliexpress.com)

Say No to Oversized or Over-tight Shorts

Steer clear from shorts that are too tight and go for a tailored cut instead as they will emphasize the size of your lower legs. Alternatively, never go with oversized baggy shorts or cargo pants with too big pockets as they make your calves and ankles seem narrower by contrast. In addition, contrary to popular beliefs an oversized baggy shorts will not make your legs bigger but will have the reverse effect instead.

 

Too tight! (pic from http://www.undergroundclothing.ca)

For those lucky guys that have strong and muscular calves, then by all means show them off! You can go with almost any length but balance with a roomier style of shorts instead. Too tight a pair of shorts will not only feminizes you but also put too much emphasis on your calves and hence will make you look shorter.

 

Fitted Cargo (pic from http://www.aliexpress.com)

Say Yes only to Fitted Cargo

As much as we like cargo pants, tread carefully if you should decide to give it a go. Due to the construction and design that feature the oversize pockets on each sides, these shorts are most flattering for men with muscular lower halves. Unless you have a great pair of legs, my advice is to avoid this altogether. The excess fabric of the outer pockets will enhance the size of your knees or calves areas and in return will make you look stumpy instead! But if you really must have them, then I suggest to go with a fitted cargo instead of the loose oversized ones!

 

Fitted with slight room, knee length berms is one of the best bet!

In my next post, I will share with you all my favourite brands of shorts and where to get them. Remember, although getting the right design or style that fits you is important, what matters most is still your personality and confidence when wearing them. Till the nest time, this is Jimen signing out! Be happy always! Cheers.